Things I Learned from Disney Movies (or How Jaded I’ve Become with Reality and Adulthood)

WARNING: The following poem is scathing in it’s honesty and has elements of caustic sarcasm in it. I’m normally a literal person, but the rare times when I get sarcastic, I’m merciless with it. Don’t expect me to hold back and not just because I’m not a fan of this company.


The Happiest Place on Earth was all a lie in hindsight.
I certainly wanted to be happy and joyful, yet I was never meant to have that kind of positivity. I could die not visiting those castles in Orlando and Anaheim, and I’d be okay with this (Sure, I’ve been to Orlando, but I never went to THAT place).

There were things I learned, but I never realized some of these things until I was in my teens or even as an adult.

I learned that beauty always equals goodness because ugly people are worthless at best or evil at worst.

I learned that happy endings come to those who don’t work hard or work smart. Well, only for certain people, that is.

I learned that originality is a sin, so it’s better to adapt, buy the rights to something or outright plagiarize someone else’s work.

I learned that princes don’t look like me.

I learned that true love is the only things that matters.

I learned that if you’re female, then you better be a size 2 at worst. Being very emaciated or obese is tantamount to being evil for those lacking a Y chromosome.

I learned that wishing is the best way to get what you want. Well, only for certain people.

I learned that fantasy is more important than reality.

I learned that you can sing your cares away because nothing EVER bad happens in musicals (Bjork reference!).

I learned that Africa is more appealing to the animators when there are no humans who look like they are from the continent. It’s a lascivious fantasy for both furries and open racists. Yeah, I said it!

I learned that stories should be recycled for that cash flow.

I learned that poverty and homelessness aren’t really THAT bad especially if you’re a stray animal.

I learned that cultural appropriation and racial degradation is the name of the game although the Polynesian community managed to be taken respectfully though.

I learned that you can’t be a hero unless you have at least one dead parent. I guess broken home lives are better for them?

I learned that life isn’t like the movies and I wished more people would notice this. Not everyone will have the same experience and some are targets of ridicule. I pity those edified by a mouse.

16 thoughts on “Things I Learned from Disney Movies (or How Jaded I’ve Become with Reality and Adulthood)

    • Thanks, Jill! Yeah, I’m not the biggest fan of that corporation. I’m not against fantasy on principle since I write fantasy works myself. My concerns come from how the fantasy is or can be interpreted and how it gives people unrealistic expectations. That or a channel to stay in suspended nostalgia while being an adult (“I can’t criticize it because of my childhood!”). Sigh, those same people need to grow up.

      Liked by 1 person

      • It’s a fine line. I think fantasy is fine, as long as one realizes that it IS fantasy and not reality. And, to an extent, I think cartoons encourage creativity and imagination in kids, but should certainly be balanced by such things as climbing trees, running barefoot through the grass, watching flowers grow, etc.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Of course, and I agree with you that way. I’m not saying they should give up cartoons and movies. Moderation is good. Maybe I’m not qualified to speak on this matter since I’m not a parent, but when I have kids, I will encourage them to make their own stories, ask questions about the media they consume, go outside and experience the environment, etc.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. This isn’t a criticism (more like a quibble) — I dig the post — but it strikes me as more of a rant than a poem. That said, it’s your post, so you can call it what you want to call it.

    I would also quibble with the idea that something “bad” happens in almost every musical. If that were literally true, there’d be no plot (or should I say,excuse for a plot). What almost every musical DOES have is a happy ending, one exception being one of my favorite musicals, CABARET.

    That said, I’m glad I came across your blog, and I’ll check out a few more of your posts later.

    Like

    • Thank you. There were certainly major rant elements which I don’t dispute. Sometimes the lines can be blurred when I have sentiments like that in poetic form.

      I can see that argument since there are conflict elements whether they have a plot or an excuse for a plot. Even then it seems like these movies involve plot conveniences or plot coupons to undercut the bad things because everything falls into place to get that happy ending (especially when that happy ending is handed of sorts).

      No problem and thanks for checking out my blog.

      Like

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